on the lighter side…

Okay, enough of the emo shit and morbid crap..

So here’s a sappy story..i finally saw him again…after 48 years. We always have different shifts. And it’s hard to always seem to anticipate. You know, the kind of anticipation wherein you feel aprehensive and you get butterflies in the stomach. And you ask yourself if you’re going to see him or not.  It’s like your first day in school wherein you’re about to introduce yourself and you totally spaced out.. You try to open your mouth and you can’t seem to come up with anything appropriate to say..So you let out this sheepish smile, which makes you look retarded and lame.

Briefly, it felt like highschool all over again.

I was speechless for 10 seconds. That was already considered as dead air. I quickly gathered my thoughts which kept flying away [probably from the lack of normal sleep].  

And we exchange some conversation [about work ofcourse] and then I get that look. The look that [in my unbias opinion] seems  like saying “So…I heard you are stalking me in friendster and even on multiply…what’s up with that?”  

And I shifted my gaze and then looked back right into those deep set eyes of his–that twit! And he he’s still  giving me that “look” and so I gave him my “so what?” look[without being too obvious]. And he seemed to have recoiled back into that normal look that says ” L-O-O-K into my eyes”.

And the conversation ended. And I was flabbergasted.

Because some booger squealed.  And I know who you are and where you live.

But anyway, I could careless.  So what? I don’t care. As if…

In my mind’s eye, I can see that bullet train zooming closer and closer. Ok, let me have it!

an unfathomable forecast

Last night, I died. It was a painful death. My body all torn into several pieces. I died from a car crash. I flew out of the car because of the impact. The cab that I was riding on my way home was trashed by a rampaging monster truck.

That was it. Goodbye world. 

This has been a recurring dream of mine. Somewhere in my subconscious are swimming images of me getting hit by a bus, a car or sometimes the MRT.

Yep, morbid right?

I don’t rely much on the concept of premonition. But what if your gut tells you…something.. but you’re not sure why or what? 

My dad had several near-death experiences, including amost getting hit my a ceiling fan(which crashed an inch away from him) and  bamboo poles accidentally cut loose from the carriage –you-know.. the one being dragged by the carabao..[yes, that’s because we’re in the province and our mode of transportation includes untamed animals], crashing into the van they were riding on their way to Legaspi. So it’s like poking several holes in a paper. It’s just that the paper is the van and there are people inside. Fortunately no one got injured badly…just a few nasty cuts and bruises for dad’s co-employees and as for him—not a single scratch.

I’m not sure how he manages to do it. I guess the top cat, indeed has 9 lives. As for me, I am an accident prone. I had my share of not-so-good experiences which includes  falling down from a flight of stairs–head first.. thus, explaining the mental retardation… I also fell into a manhole,and ran into a glass door. Yet, here I am alive and kicking! Amazing!

So yep, I was quite disturbed by these dreams of mine. But who knows what lies ahead…

Abangan.. 

The Walls

I tend to build walls around me. I guess it’s my default defense mechanism. And I find it apalling that I can’t get help it.  Maybe because I’ve been an only child. Maybe because… I am exhibiting autistic tendencies.

I am completely wussing out in certain degrees of interaction. 

At some point, my mental retardation overwhelms me.

Only because, I feel like crap today. Was it the suddenly change of weather? My hormonal imbalance? A sudden longing for a long weekend? A sudden longing to get away from life in the metro? 

This post is just one way of  affirming that I am continiously building walls.

I am loosing touch or maybe it’s just the lack of sleep and the deprivation of tv time.

how to stay sane

If,everyone has their own anti-stress kit, there would be less self-mutilation….or NOT?!

target acquired

If things starts going your way..be afraid.. be very afraid. Because not all things should go your way. If everything is so peachy and perfect it only means one thing — the end is near.

If things are going so well and suddenly you find yourself saying” Now, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”, think again because somewhere in the midst of your loathing, a dementor is aiming it’s a target.

Be very cautious because, the whole universe is conniving — no, conspiring, an evil plot against you.

It’s like PUNK’D ..only, you won’t have your share of laughs.