Breaking the Habit

Oh shit. I overslept. Now, it’s Monday. Today’s the best day to blog. While everyone’s in a hurry trying so hard not to get stuck in traffic, I’m here curling in bed with Edward…

Oops. Did I just say that out loud?? Yeah, I’m stuck with this read—TWILIGHT (it’s long overdue actually). Pretty much I’m stranded in the boring part so I decided to write instead.

I’m having trouble keeping up with this new direction of mine. I guess this is what it means to take a risk. Well, I needed to. And no, it has nothing to do with being recruited to the SMILE PATROL. This one is through by alter ego’s own initiative. Perky-chocolate-addict that she is –there’s way too much endorphines in her system right now. Plus, I happen to  have a brain (which often malfunctions after 3:00 a.m. but that’s beyond the point). It’s time to take immediate action to that pressing situation. I had to look at the glass half-full. Dang! That’s even harder than shedding a pound.  But hey, I’m trying. I’m starting to get used to a non-weekender me. I’ve finally accepted the fact that I’m living in a third-world country. Being young and underpaid is koolah. It’s my eighth month in this current chorewhore gig. Yes it feels like being  in a relationship. There’s commitment and then there are little conflicts here and there….sometimes a screaming boss throwing tantrums at you which can be likened to a girl’s reaction when you let her wait for an hour or two on your first date.

So yeah, I’m in a relationship…a very demanding (in an s & m kind of way) one which I’m hating and loving at the same time. And on certain occasions I just want to pull off a break up fight. But that would just affirm my present state of loserdom. How pathetic is that?

Also, I’m immune to the sporadic rain showers in that area. I swear I feel like I’m in a different timezone when I’m there (well, except for I AM!). One minute it’s sunny and the next thing I know it’s like some blazing idiot roused Poseidon from slumber. The land meets the see once more.

So everything’s peachy now and this whole acceptance and delayed realization is quite working out but let me just tell you about last week. Last Friday was the grandfather of all epic failures. I mean seriously! Can you just let Friday be a TGIF? But nooooooo.

I’m handling this new account–a pilot team of 32 associates whose mostly composed of yuppies from other contact centres. The common denominator there was they all left their previous company because of some unresolved payroll disputes. I was confident enough while I was distributing the payslips because I knew that I checked my payroll file twice and everything was in place. But well…whatdya fucking know, as soon I they ripped them open, I saw sheer dismay instead of joy. And thus, just like a wild fire, I was obliterated into a mere speck of dust.

I do not and will not tolerate incompetence. And shit, I will not take responsibility for this.. Clearly, there was a miss out. But I am sure it was not mine. I immediately checked with my supervisor. I told her that the basic salaries of the associates were all screwed up. Some had higher pay (higher than they are ought to have), while some (I’m sure they were so close to biting my head off) will go home disappointed.  My supervisor was shocked. She has no idea how it happened. She said that someone must have extracted the wrong file. It was clearly messed up. But there are only 3 people who has access to the master payroll file, and that excludes me. So who the hell fucked it up???

And I thought that was the end of it. After that, I received an email from one of my other accounts telling me that four of his associates did not receive the attendance incentive. WTF? Am I being punk’d?? When I had it checked again, their names where not in the master file. I opened the Attendance report master file and they were missing too.  Who the fuck deleted their names? Somebody must have overwritten the damn file.  After apologizing for the nth time, I just informed them that we’ll make the adjustments in the next pay period.

And I thought that was the end of it. But wait, there’s more. Four more. The next thing I knew, the four supervisors of my other account came in. There were payroll disputes too—unresolved at that because it was not raised–ever! Well, how am I suppose to take action to something I was not even aware until now. It’s like going to battle with no ammo.  So now, they’re asking for my help because they can no longer pacify the disgruntled associates. Why did it took them so long to raise this? Some disputes dates back July. Hey, whatever happened to real time action taking? I hated backtracking.  Well, for one thing we had no choice but to straighten things out and for the nth time clarify some issues in the sucky suck suck  attendance policies. We had to re-orient them with payroll deadlines too because clearly some of the delays are caused by them not passing the OTs on time.  Good thing it all ended with a compromise.  Hello, crisis management!

Come Saturday, I was amped to cheer for our team. It’s sports fest weekend once again. I overstayed because of the basketball. I was in charge of Badminton. Thank God, it started and ended on time. Plus it was a dispute-free event. Yipee.

So anyway, I was cheering my lungs out. We had a 10-point advantage by halftime. But come third quarter, our team started committing unnecessary fouls, two players were injured by the brutal plays of the other team.  Our efforts to control the ball were useless against the opponents’ street-balling ways. So in the end, we were pwnd in one disappointing loss.

Yes we were defeated. Our very first game against the non-shooting team (for almost half the game) was an utter ” What the fuck just happened” experience. I could have sworn that we were robbed. I can almost taste sweet victory.   The other team bitchslapped the Wolves so bad it left a huge mark. I think we should rename the team as little red riding hoods. But the battle is not yet over. Sure, they can gloat with their humongous egos now. It’s just the second leg. Maybe later. Luck won’t be that tough. 

But amidst the current state of chaos and running errands here and there, life never fails to throw little pebbles at you that can make you go “You’re kidding, right?”

Here’s an example:

I’m sharing a conversation (not in verbatim):

E: Hey, Ms. J!

J: Yo, wuzzup?

E: Hi, ka daw ni ano….

J: Sino?

E: Ni ano….

J: Ay tado, hindi ako manghuhula para basa kung sino nasa isip mo.. sino nga?

E: Eto naman parang hindi ngbabasa ng email thread.. kunwari hindi mo alam!!! hehehe

J: *scratches head* Ah, yun?! etchos! Bumalik ka na sa trabaho pumipetiks ka n2man!

And this is why I love power tripping.  But, yeah, the email threads. Why the hell did I even bother? Well, because a.) I was bored. b.) I was looking for some sort of diversion from the migraine-inducing excel files that I’ve been looking at all day.  What would be my future kids’ reaction when they ask me ” Mom, how did you met Dad?” and my answer be ” Well, kids it all started with Tequilla….”

No. We’ll definitely have to tweak that one. And puhlease rumors are not true, the new direction does not have a name. It can be a person but well, let’s not jinx bloody fate shall we? Etchos!

As of now, I leave you with a demotivational poster:

I’m expecting two things later:

1. A very long email from the boss questioning the grandfather of epic failures.

2. A clean desk with no papers for signing, no leave forms to approve, no overtime to encode. ABSOLUTELY worry free Monday!

Of course, I’m expecting the former which is why breaking the old habit is  really a great challenge.